So I promised to share some of my daily life and let me tell you this weekend was a doozy. From Brad so busy to kids getting major grounding to my complete and utter exhaustion Sunday, life got hectic but we just pushed thru.
Before I’m able to get into all of that though, I need to talk about recurring and constant victimization and what it can so to your new family. There are so many things and details I want to be able to share about our lives, but I can’t. Why you ask? Well, my writing is pinpointed on helping motivate victims and most importantly, helping educate those before they can be victimized. I do this pulling from my own personal experience and unfortunately I still have people attempting to victimize my family. So I try to give you a lot without revelation into things I have to keep private. But as a message to those who are still attempting, you won’t find what you’re looking for here. I do however appreciate you driving up my daily traffic. If you were unaware, I can see who, what, when, and how they looked at my pages. So I do appreciate your daily checkups. Here’s something just for you. Wrong Song
For all of you wondering if that person or people who create the drama in your life or if your abuser ever goes away, I’m here to tell you unfortunately they do not. They will spend every second they can thinking of ways to bring you back into their cycle until they’ve found a new victim. That is unless you have children together or they’re a parent etc. One of my biggest fears was realized when I started dating again. He not only badgered me, but harrassed a man I was dating AND that man’s family. Of course at that point we had to just go our separate ways and that was the day I marched down to the courthouse and took out a protection order. From then on out though, I felt like I had no chances at ever having a normal life. I would have to watch every step because that piece of paper is nothing to protect me physically and mentally. It protects me and my children legally, but the law is not much to a full blown narcissistic abuser.
Then comes along Brad and we all know the story. But I made sure to tell him EVERYTHING. I held nothing back. I fully expected him to say, screw this. She’s got way too much baggage. But of course he didn’t and that my friends is what you’re looking for. Don’t hide the past from your future relationships.
If that person is truly going to be a good catch, they will not run away from a battle for you. They will embrace that battle with you.
I know this is shorter than many lessons I try and provide, but that’s the essence of it. Don’t hide. Your new family will need care and a little more protection, like keeping pictures private for your friends, or making sure you don’t accidentally post a picture of your location specifics. Street signs, restaurants, etc. But for the most part, your life will continue normally and that person will just keep searching and searching and find nothing despite their claims. You ARE in control of your life so don’t let them make you feel any different.